


Crushes

by BlackPepper3964



Series: Crushes and Coils [1]
Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Akashi is confused, Demi-sexual Akashi, Embarrassed Akashi is adorable, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, I'm so sorry, Kuroko is blunt, Kuroko's parents are horrible, Love, M/M, Quasi-romantic Asexual Kuroko, Sexual Content, akashi helps, and adorable, and fluff, but they try to be supportive, he's also hurting, lots of fluff, not everyone understands
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-26
Updated: 2016-07-27
Packaged: 2018-07-26 17:22:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,375
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7583080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlackPepper3964/pseuds/BlackPepper3964
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kuroko has been expecting them for a while, really. The questions. He just doesn't know how to answer. Quasi-romantic asexual!Kuroko and Demi-sexual Akashi</p><p>'It isn’t until their second year and they all turn seventeen that the questions Kuroko had been expecting for the past year get asked.</p><p>"Na, Tetsu. Do you like anyone?" Kuroko pretends to be oblivious.'</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

It isn’t until their second year and they all turn seventeen that the questions Kuroko had been expecting for the past year get asked.

“Na, Tetsu.” Aomine nudges his arm playfully with his elbow when they’re having a small break from their weekly game of street basketball. “Do you like anyone?” Kuroko pretends to be oblivious, playing with the basketball in his hand, spinning it.

“I like all of my friends and teammates, Aomine-kun.” He gives Aomine’s frustrated and resigned expression a small smile. “And, of course, basketball and vanilla milkshakes.” His taller friend groans.

“Tetsu, I didn’t mean it like that!” Kuroko just tilts his head in false curiosity.

 

“Oi, Kuroko. Have you ever thought about anyone in _that_ way?” Kagami asks one day, red painting his cheeks from the embarrassing question. Inwardly sighing, Kuroko stares at him blankly.

“In what way, Kagami-kun?” Kagami eyes him carefully.

“You know, I can never tell when you’re pulling my legs when you look like that.” The tealette tilts his head.

“Kagami-kun, this is my face. I always ‘look’ like this. Also, my hands are nowhere near your legs.” He keeps his expression complete deadpan as he pulls off a downgraded jazz hands. “See?” Kagami, much like he expected, drops the subject of Kuroko’s romantic life and face-palms, groaning.

“It’s an expression! And I _know_ that’s your face, you moron.”

 

“Kuroko, if you wish to romantically pursue someone, we will all be behind you one hundred percent!” Kuroko stumbles and misses the pass he’d been preparing, the ball going out of bounds instead of into Fukuda’s hands. The first years laugh behind their hands, but stop and straighten when Kuroko lowers his hands, blank expression in place.

“Kiyoshi-senpai.” He says, tone completely calm, compared to the air around him. The first and second years take a collective step back. The third years are unaffected. “Could you possibly not blurt out things like that in the middle of a game?” Kiyoshi laughs, a hand rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly.

“Ah, gomen, gomen. But the thought came into my head, so I just said it.” Hyuuga slaps the back of his head.

“D’aho! Of course we would, but it doesn’t need to be said, _especially during practice_!” Hyuuga adjusts his glasses and looks sideways at Kuroko, giving him a nod, which elicits a smile, and stalks off to the court. “Why have you stopped playing? Play!” He yells, leaving everyone scrambling to comply.

 

Kise bounces around him for twenty minutes at the next GoM ‘meeting’. They played basketball for two hours before they stopped to have lunch in the nearest park.

“Kurokocchi!” He whines, and Kuroko inwardly sighs as he tries to remove Kise’s arms from himself. “Why don’t you love me?” Kuroko closes his eyes in irritation. Kise gasps dramatically and loudly exclaims “Do you love someone else?” while flinging himself away from the tealette. Everyone stops ignoring Kise at that moment and turns to the two, curiosity painting their features. Well, Murasakibara seems to be more interested in his snacks, but Kuroko knows he’s listening, and he despairs when he sees the same curiosity in even Akashi’s eyes.  He sighs aloud this time.

“I don’t know.” Kise and Aomine look confused.

“How can you not know if you like someone like that?” Kuroko frowns, looking away at Aomine’s question. After a moment, he asks, “Do you find anyone hot?” Confusion ripples through the tealette.

“Hot?” He looks back at them all and frowns a little deeper. “I suppose I think a few people are aesthetically pleasing.” He shrugs. “I don’t really understand the hype about it.”  Midorima and Akashi look at Kuroko closely before exchanging glances. Midorima clears his throat, pushing his glasses up his nose.

“Kuroko, are you sexually attracted to anyone? I believe that is what Kise and Aomine are doing a poor job of asking.” The two immediately protest at the insinuation that they can’t ask a simple question. Kuroko thinks for a moment, even though he already knows the answer.

“No.” Aomine gapes.

“What about Satsuki? She was always flinging herself on you. Surely you felt something then.” Kuroko quietly shakes his head. “Is she not pretty enough or something?” The tealette narrows his eyes.

“Personally, I don’t believe you should be talking about Momoi-san in that way. It sounds like you’re trying to sell her off based on her sexual appeal.” He bites, furious on the absent woman’s behalf. Aomine jolts back in surprise and fear. “And yes, she is pretty, but I don’t like her like that.” He pauses, calming down a little. “She knows that and respects it.” He says firmly. The ‘ _and if you’re a good friend, you will also_ ’ is left unsaid, but Aomine appears to understand as he lowers his gaze and mutters a ‘sorry’. Kuroko nods.

Kise jumps in, a little shaky from Kuroko’s sudden show of temper, but trying to sort-of lighten the mood. “Then what about romantically? Do you have a crush on anyone?” Kuroko looks confused.

“I’m… not quite sure what a crush is, to be honest.” Everyone stares at him in surprise. “What?” He asks, shifting back a little in self-consciousness.

“How can you not know what a crush is?” Kise and Aomine ask in unison. It’s an innocent question, but it hits Kuroko hard. Anger and hurt bubbles in him at the insensitivity. Instead of making him out to be abnormal, they could at least ask what he felt that was closest to a crush, or what he understood it to be.

He keeps his voice low, controlled and calm. “Because I haven’t ever felt whatever nonsense the media spouts about how crushes are supposed to feel like and it doesn’t really help when people like you ask that instead of explaining – as if crushes are meant to be felt by everyone and anyone who doesn’t isn’t normal.” He stands and collects his bag, sending a vicious look to Kise and Aomine, who suddenly look quite guilty. He sighs wearily, pushing his anger down, knowing that it’s mostly frustration at himself anyway. “My apologies for snapping at you. I’ll see you all in two weeks.” He says, giving a short bow and leaving.

 

He doesn’t go home just yet. Instead, he wanders the park a little before sitting down on an empty bench in a quieter area of the park. He runs his hand through his hair, feeling ridiculously tired. Resting back against the bench, Kuroko tilts his head to the sky, one hand unconsciously resting on his chest where he could feel his heart beating steadily.

He blinks when the sky is suddenly obscured by crimson. “Kuroko.” He turns, taking in Akashi’s small smile.

“Akashi-kun.” Kuroko nods his head in a small bow. “How can I help you?” Akashi sits next to him and carefully doesn’t look at him.

“I’m sorry about Aomine and Kise.” Kuroko shakes his head, smiling a little.

“It’s fine, you don’t have to apologise for them. I overreacted.” The smile turns bitter. “I should know better. I was frustrated because people have been asking a lot of questions recently, and I’ve been avoiding answering them because… well…” He trails, not sure how to explain his fear that everyone won’t treat him the same because of his identity, or that they will think he’s a freak. He also doesn’t know how to explain that he knows, logically, that it’s irrational, but that he can’t stop the fear from choking him every time he wants to tell them.

“Kuroko, would you mind telling me what you identify as?” Akashi turns his head a little in his direction, a gentle look in his eyes. Kuroko looks away.

“Romantically or sexually?” Akashi smiles at the petulant mutter.

“Both?” He asks hopefully.

“….. I’m a quasi-romantic asexual.” Akashi blinks while Kuroko looks at him through his lashes, gauging his reaction. After a couple of seconds, Akashi smiles, a little amused.

“That’s quite complicated for you. I can see why you’re frustrated.” Kuroko looks at him fully in the face.

“Why do you know what that is?” Kuroko cringes when the question comes out more accusing than he wanted it to. It was _supposed_ to be a simple question. Akashi laughs softly, not offended in the least, knowing exactly what is going through Kuroko’s head.

“Well, I’m a demi-sexual myself.” He shrugs nonchalantly. “I was curious, so I looked everything else up as well. It helps to be well informed about things like that so that no one is offended.” His eyes twinkle in mirth.

“And you are absolute.” Kuroko quips and Akashi is startled into laughter, sounding much less refined than his usual chuckles and snickers behind his hand.

“That’s right.” He finally agrees amusedly. “I am absolute.” Kuroko blinks in surprise at the hint of orange in Akashi’s left eye as he used the ‘ _boku_ ’ pronoun. Then he smiles as the orange fades.

“Ah. So he’s still there?” Akashi nods, looking a little apprehensive. Kuroko smiles wider as his eyes soften affectionately, surprising Akashi. “Good.”

“… Good?” The redhead asks tentatively. Kuroko scoots a little closer, bumping his shoulder with Akashi’s playfully, and nods.

“Un. He’s a part of you, isn’t he?” Akashi’s eyes grow wide. “Then I accept him fully. Akashi-kun is Akashi-kun, after all.”

“But… I hurt you. Incredibly so.” Akashi looked away, the orange tint to his eye returning. “I toyed with your childhood friends’ team and did so with no remorse.” Kuroko kept quiet, just watching Akashi, knowing that he had to get it off his chest, or the lingering feelings from it would fester. “I didn’t care that you weren’t enjoying basketball anymore, nor did I care that the team was falling apart. I didn’t care when Daiki hurt you so badly on the night we met, and instead only made it worse.” Akashi’s left eye was fully golden now, but instead of the cold look Kuroko was used to with this persona, there was sadness and guilt. “I just watched as you shattered like so much glass after that championship and offered no comfort.” Kuroko blinks.

“You were…” Akashi nods.

“Yes. I saw you fall apart after the game, and I just watched.” Akashi’s eyes were looking rather shiny at this point. “At the time I thought you were weak, pathetic. What was there to be upset about if we won? Then when you quit the club and told me that you weren’t going to run away anymore, I was amused.” Akashi smiles, his eyes wide, something insane lingering in them. “I thought it was interesting. What could you possibly do? With your style of basketball, where you have to have a strong basketball player to shadow? But then you started _winning_. Winning against Ryouta, Shintarou, Daiki and Atsushi. I was impressed, but then my game with Shintarou only cemented to me that the others had grown weak.” He sighs, the smile leaving his face, coldness glinting in his eyes once more. “My intention at our game was to utterly destroy your team, much like I destroyed your friend just a few months before.” Akashi shrugs, looking uncomfortable to Kuroko, who continued to listen calmly. “I was… proud, I suppose, when you didn’t break again, and instead inspired your team, asking to be put in. And I must admit, I was incredibly impressed when you developed your own version of the Emperor Eye. I look forward to seeing how you use it in the future.” Akashi stands, and Kuroko unconsciously follows him, and is subsequently shocked when Akashi bows to him at a perfect ninety-degree angle. “I deeply apologise for intentionally causing you pain. I understand if you wouldn’t want to be close to me once again because of what happened –” Akashi pauses when Kuroko gently grasps his shoulders and pulls him up, his heterochromatic eyes glinting confusedly. “Tetsuya?”

“Bakashi-kun.” Kuroko says as he steps even closer and pulls the surprised Akashi into a hug, something no one had ever dared to since his mother died. “I forgave you. A long time ago.” He feels Akashi’s arms rise and cradle his shoulders and hugs the redhead tighter. “How could I not? You’re my friend, and you gave me so many new ones, whether you recognise it or not.” Akashi lowers his head, resting it on top of Kuroko’s.

“I did so many horrible things –” He cuts off with a yelp when Kuroko gives him a rough jab in the ribs and he suddenly sympathises with Daiki when he used to complain how ‘ _Tetsu’s jabs really hurt! He might look weak, but he’s got a lot of strength in those tiny arms of his!_ ’.

“Bakashi-kun.” Kuroko huffs, much to Akashi’s bemusement over the repeated insult. “The only horrible thing I can think of that you did was trying to deprive me of my vanilla milkshakes.” Akashi blinks and then laughs.

“Tetsuya, they are bad for you.” He continues the old argument and winces when Kuroko pinches his side.

“I don’t care.” He grumbles. “I like my daily milkshake.” Shaking his head, Akashi sighs, his left eye returning to red.

“Fine, Kuroko. I won’t restrict you again.” He pulls away from the hug. He smiles at the tealette. “How about we go and get one now?” Kuroko blinks, face impassive.

“That would be nice.” Akashi knows that is an understatement when he can see the sparkles surrounding Kuroko and he chuckles.

“Come then,” He says, grabbing Kuroko’s hand and tugging him along.

 

Akashi cannot stop his amused smile as he watches Kuroko drink his milkshake as they sit in one of the booths at Maji Burger. Akashi has a cup of tea in front of him, but he’s barely touched it, too busy watching the happy air Kuroko excludes like a visible aura as he drinks with a completely blank face. He found it funny in Teiko and, if anything, it has become funnier because Kuroko has mastered his emotionless mask.

He doesn’t realise that he’s been staring at Kuroko for a long time, until Kuroko sets down his empty cup with a slightly disappointed look and fixes him with a curious look.

“Akashi-kun?” Akashi blinks.

“Yes, Kuroko?” Kuroko looks away quickly before his gaze meets his.

“What is a crush?” Akashi leans back in his seat, pondering this.

“It’s what I would call an obsession. You think about that person a lot, start trying to get their approval and attention. You feel good when they pay attention to you and bad when they don’t like what you’ve done or when you’ve upset them.” Kuroko frowns. “What?”

“But that sounds like friendship.” Akashi nodded.

“It sort of is when you know the person, except for the fact that crushes are a bit more extreme in that they are the one person you treasure above all others, and from what I hear, if you don’t have enough self-confidence, crushes can tear you apart.” Kuroko tilts his head in silent question. “Say that your crush appears to like their partner to be outgoing and talkative.” The tealette scrunches his face a little in distaste, making Akashi chuckle. “If you have a big enough crush in that person, most people will try to become more outgoing and talkative, even if they’re not.”

“That seems counter-productive.”

“Hm?” Akashi hums curiously at Kuroko’s objection.

“Surely, if you are looking to spend… the rest of your life together?” Kuroko looks at Akashi for approval and when he nods, he continues, “You would want someone who would accept you for how you are, not who you pretend to be. It sounds exhausting to change yourself and pretend for the sake of another person all the time. What if the other person doesn’t like you in that way?” Akashi nods.

“Exactly. Most crushes that adolescents go through are either unrequited, or not enough to build a strong relationship. It’s why people also call crushes infatuations.” Kuroko nods, a thoughtful look on his face.

“In that case, I don’t believe I’ve ever had a crush, and by how irrational it seems to be, I don’t think I want one.” Akashi half-smiled.

“Fair enough.” But Kuroko wasn’t done yet.

“Taking away the parts where I want to change who I am to meet someone else’s standards, it does sound familiar to something I have felt before.” He says slowly, thoughtfully. Akashi leans forward, almost fascinated.

“About who?” Kuroko blinks, staring at him.

“You.” Akashi almost chokes. “What? By your own definition, a crush is when you think about that person a lot and try to get their approval and attention. I felt that when we were in Teiko and I joined the basketball team. Even when you did change, it didn’t change the fact I wanted your attention and approval. I felt good when you acknowledged my efforts, and felt bad when I disappointed you.” The tealette nods decisively and looks at him with a triumphant glint in his eyes. “Akashi-kun. It appears I have a crush on you.” Akashi _does_ choke now, eyes wide in surprise as his cheeks flare red. He coughs to clear his throat, reluctantly amused.

“Leave it to you to be blunt, Kuroko.” He says when he’s finished coughing, a blush still tinting his skin. “You just come out with the embarrassing things.” Kuroko blinks.

“If I don’t say them, how are you supposed to know? Crushes are often unrequited, and I don’t mind if you don’t feel the same way for me, Akashi-kun.” He smiles, something placid and tranquil about him. “It’s enough that I told you. If you don’t want a relationship with me, then I don’t mind. I like being friends with you.” He reaches for his drink, and frowns sadly. “I don’t like being without vanilla milkshake though.” He stands. “I’ll be back in a moment, Akashi-kun. I need another milkshake. My throat isn’t used to talking so much.” As he ambles off, Akashi stares at his back, not sure what to feel.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Akashi and Kuroko talk out their relationship, Kuroko's parents aren't so nice, and things are a little awkward.
> 
> (also, sexy times happen)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE NOTE: I think I should mention that from the meeting with the GoM in the previous chapter to the end of this one takes place after they all enter their third year in high school. The little snippets before the meeting with GoM happen between January 31st (Kuroko's birthday) and April (the beginning of the school year in Japan). I say this because there is a moment in this chapter where Kuroko mentions their 'last Winter Cup': as in, not the first. Just to clear things up.
> 
> Also WARNING: There may be triggering content in this, I'm not sure, but it certainly is sensitive. I try to never make light of the things I make the characters I write about go through, and try to portray situations that can and do (I'm sure, with how insensitive humanity can be) happen as accurately as possible. So yes, please be aware that Kuroko is going through some rough stuff with parents that don't quite understand him and how to react to him.  
> There is also sexual content, so if you don't like it you can skip it or just stop reading altogether because nothing much happens right at the end of the chapter. Please do keep an open mind though, as asexuality isn't the same for everyone.

When Kuroko had returned from getting his second milkshake, Akashi still didn’t quite know what to say. This appeared to be perfectly fine with Kuroko, who was content to merely drink his personal ambrosia and watch the people bustling around the restaurant, interspersed with glances at him. Kuroko pouted when the milkshake slurped empty and looked at Akashi for a moment.

“Akashi-kun?” Akashi blinked out of his thoughts and looks away from the window. “Would you like to come to dinner?” The redhead nodded.

“Okay, I’ll let my father know.” He quickly sent a text to his father and collected his things, Kuroko quickly following suit.

They were both quiet on the way to Kuroko’s house, and it allowed Akashi some more time to think. He wasn’t quite sure how he felt about the tealette, having never bothered to analyse their relationship beyond ‘teammates’ and later ‘opponents’. He knew he enjoyed Kuroko’s company, his quiet presence calming in comparison to the sheer energy of Aomine and Kise, and the competitiveness of Midorima, and the reliance of Murasakibara. There were many things he could talk to the tealette about, as their interests were similar, and even when their opinions were different they tended to have enjoyable debates about the subject before agreeing to disagree. What he most enjoyed is when one of them finds out new information about that subject, and then, no matter how much time had passed, bring it up again with the new evidence, sparking the debate again. It was something Akashi really treasured about their time together in Teiko – the proof that Kuroko had enjoyed spending time with him as much he had with the tealette.

After Akashi’s change, Kuroko had continued to try to have those long conversations with him, but Akashi had brushed him off, stating that he was busy. It had hurt the boy, he’d known that, but _that_ Akashi hadn’t been particularly bothered – even if he was now. The redhead knew that his distancing hadn’t helped Kuroko to cope with Aomine pushing him away, even outside of basketball, and only made him feel even more lonely, as his relationship with Murasakibara, Kise and Midorima was mainly basketball-centred. Of course, those relationships were also strained when their talents emerged.

Akashi supposed that he’d always been rather fond of Kuroko. He’d admired the determination the tealette held for basketball, even when he couldn’t do much, merely pass and dribble. There was something so eye-catching about Kuroko’s inner strength that Akashi couldn’t take his eyes away, nor did he want to. And Kuroko was kind, so very kind. He forgives people easily, and merely wants the best for them, the biggest example being the Kiseki no Sedai themselves. Instead of wanting to beat them out of revenge for the hurt they caused, the tealette had wanted to do it so that they could love basketball again, in the way that they used to, rather than it be another chore they have to do alongside schoolwork. He brought the enjoyment of the sport back into their lives, and even restored Akashi to the self he was before the pressure he was under to be as perfect as a human could possibly be and the fear that he may be abandoned by his teammates as they were all developing their skills, becoming stronger, while he had stayed as he was, merely trying to keep the team together with teamwork.

He refused to overlook the fact that Kuroko would not have abandoned him, would have stayed with him, even if he hadn’t relinquished his consciousness to his other, more ruthless self. Kuroko, who didn’t have immense skill or talent, who recognise hard work over everything else, who eventually saved all of them, would have stayed with Akashi, and may have even brought the team back together again before Akashi broke the team… and slowly began to break Kuroko.

“… ashi-kun. Akashi-kun.” Kuroko’s voice interrupted his thoughts. The redhead looked at him, noticing the concern and amusement in the other man’s eyes. “We’re here.” The tealette smiled. Akashi blinked and looked around. Indeed, they were standing in front of Kuroko’s house, with the shadow holding the key in the lock. Cheekiness entered his expression. “I thought I should let you know in case you tripped over the doorway.” Akashi narrowed his eyes in a playful glare as Kuroko turned the key and opened the door, letting himself and his guest enter.

“I would never do anything so undignified.” Kuroko pursed his lips, clearly trying not to laugh as he turned away. The redhead couldn’t find it in himself to be irritated by the mocking, and treasured the calm and relaxation that Kuroko always made him feel instead. He took his shoes off at the entryway, muttered “Pardon my intrusion”, and followed Kuroko to the kitchen and dining room. He paused as he sat down at the table, looking around. “Where are your parents?” The room’s temperature lowered a little as the tealette put down the pan he was holding.

“They… are on a business trip.” Akashi frowned at the lightness of the answer, at odds with the tension lining Kuroko’s back.

“How long will they be on this trip?” Kuroko shrugged casually and continued to retrieve ingredients from the fridge.

“It’s coming up the third month. They didn’t say when they’d be back.” Kuroko got a knife from cutlery drawer, along with a spoon and a fork. Akashi frowned. This was another thing that he admired about Kuroko, as much as it made him feel sad. Kuroko was so strong, so self-sufficient and independent that he didn’t tell anyone when he was hurting or sad, or even lonely, because he’d been brought up alone and took care of himself as soon as he was able to. His parents didn’t really want a child, but didn’t want to abort the unborn child, nor did they put him up for adoption when he was born. However, that didn’t mean they cared for him. Kuroko was taught everything he needed to survive on his own in the house and for school before he was ten. His manners came from his parents, who had told him not to burden anyone else with his concerns and troubles, because no one wanted to hear them. So long as he kept out of trouble, his parents didn’t care what he did. Hence why he was able to keep a dog he found on the streets with no problems, and Akashi had a horrible feeling that they didn’t even know he _had_ taken one in. They never really talked to Kuroko unless it was his studies (they couldn’t have their only child disgrace their family with poor grades), his allowance, or to tell him they were going away.

Akashi had hoped that had changed since Teiko, but apparently not. It had appeared to get worse though, if the way Kuroko was holding himself was any indication.

“How did they react?” Kuroko paused, turning to Akashi with a confused expression. “To your romantic and sexual identity.” The tealette’s eyes went blank and he went back to chopping the vegetables.

“They were fine.” Akashi sighed and stood. Deciding that he wanted to confront and comfort Kuroko while also testing how he felt about the other man, he hugged him from behind, resting his chin on his shoulder, eyes fixed Kuroko’s hands that continued to chop. “Akashi-kun?” Akashi was half-surprised that Kuroko had no hint of suspicion or curiosity at his sudden action. Kuroko just appeared to accept it.

“Don’t lie to me.” The knife was put down carefully, making a slight noise.

“This is their third business trip this year.” Akashi blinked. It was August. “I told them in November, just before our last Winter Cup. They didn’t say a word to me for three weeks and left the country in December. They didn’t come back until the middle of February.” Akashi hugged him tighter. “When they came back, they told me that I was being ridiculous and that, to avoid being a complete disgrace, I was to conceive an heir when I was nineteen with a woman _who I was to impregnate_ _the normal way_.” Kuroko’s voice lowered bitterly and his body trembled. “Akashi-kun, the only thing they allowed me was that I didn’t have to marry her. They said that they, along with the mother, would raise the child, but that ‘I could have visitation rights’.” Kuroko bowed his head, one hand rising to his mouth, as if trying to stop himself from throwing up. “That’s even assuming I can impregnate the poor woman in the first place.” Akashi spun the tealette in his arms, drawing him into a proper hug.

“Kuroko,” he breathed into his hair, “you are a fool if you think I’d let that happen to you.” He smiled weakly to no one. “I’m your friend, remember?” Except, friendship didn’t quite cover all he felt for the tealette. Kuroko shook his head.

“Akashi-kun, it’s fine. You don’t need to bother yourself –” Akashi shushed him.

“Didn’t I say don’t lie to me? You obviously aren’t fine. Kami-sama, how did you play basketball?” Kuroko laughed wetly.

“There’s a reason I love basketball, Akashi-kun. It’s my escape and I make great friends through it.” The tealette pulled away. “Now let me make dinner.” Chuckling, but unable to push down his worry, Akashi let him go, sitting back down at the table. “Did you tell your father?” Kuroko asked after a moment of quiet.

“Yes.” Akashi replied and continued without Kuroko needing to ask, “I told him straight out that if I didn’t love the person he wanted me to marry, then I wouldn’t marry them, as it wouldn’t result in an heir anyway.” He shrugged, resting his chin on his palm, fingers curled towards themselves with his elbow on the table. “He was remarkably blasé about the whole thing, surprisingly, and said that if needs must, he’d have me donate sperm for the purpose of an heir and he’d let me do as I wish, so long as I continue to work as his heir, and eventually take over the company.” He snickers suddenly. “I may have shamed him into that, actually, by mentioning how much pressure he put on me when I was a child and in middle school, which really is healthy for no child.”

“How sly, Akashi-kun.” Kuroko commented, a smile on his face as he turned to the redhead. “I’m happy for you.” And he truly was, Akashi mused, once again struck by the innate _goodness_ in Kuroko. Anyone else would have been happy, yes, but that would have been over-shadowed by the envy and covetousness that they would feel, with someone else getting what they so wanted, which in this case was acceptance. Instead, Kuroko was really, truly _happy_ that Akashi wasn’t hassled or denied by his father, and allowed to do as he wished with his personal life. He smiled fondly.

“Thank you, Kuroko.” He said, and watched as Kuroko put the vegetables in the pan, and quickly washed the chopping board before getting out some meat and another knife, while also preparing another pan and some rice. 

 _You love him._ Akashi blinked, not expecting to hear his other self’s voice.

_‘What?’_

_You love Tetsuya._ The voice seemed to huff. Akashi sent a thoughtful look to Kuroko’s back.

‘ _I do? Then what about you? Do you like him?_ ’ His other self bristled.

 _Yes, you do. And of course I don’t. I_ lost _to him._ Akashi waited a beat.

‘ _That doesn’t mean you don’t like him._ ’ He got the impression the other was looking away sulkily.

_It does._

_‘You care for him, don’t you? I do recall the night you two met that you gave him a towel and told him not to catch a cold, despite your harsh words afterwards.’_ His other self cringed. _‘Are you taking after Midorima? Are you a tsundere now?’_   Spluttering. In the privacy of his own mind, he grinned.

_As if! I’m not afraid to express how I feel for Tetsuya! In fact, you are!_

‘ _How so?’_ He was interested to hear his other self’s opinion. A snort.

 _Why do you think you were so embarrassed when he outright said that he had a crush on you, us. It wasn’t that you didn’t feel the same way, it was that you weren’t expecting him to just say it. You knew what he was going to say, but you were still embarrassed anyway._ A roll of the eyes, and his other self was gazing at him in contempt. _Just because you’re too focussed on your friendship with him, you don’t want to try something else because it might ruin what you two have right now._ The was a glint of wry self-loathing in heterochromatic eyes, and a mirthless smile. _I doubt you could do worse than me._ Akashi weighed this for a moment.

‘ _I suppose that’s true._ ’

 _Besides, neither of us know what Tetsuya is and isn’t comfortable with, so that conversation has to happen, but even if the relationship_ does _fail, why do you think that Tetsuya would let us go so easily. If it didn’t work out, we’d still remain friends, just with more secrets between each other and more knowledge. In fact, we’d probably be closer_ because _the relationship fell apart and Tetsuya wouldn’t let us return to the distance we’re at now._ Akashi blinked.

‘ _I thought you didn’t like him.’_

 _Haven’t you been paying attention? I don’t like him. I love him._ Akashi chuckled out loud. Leave it to his other self to be so literal and exact.

“Akashi-kun?” Kuroko turned towards him, meat sizzling on the grill, and vegetables and rice boiling. “Would you mind setting up the table, while I dish up?” A small smile on his face hiding the fact that he was surprised that he’d been talking to his other self for so long that dinner was almost ready, he agreed, taking the chopsticks, condiments and plates and putting them on the table, setting them out so the bowls of food would be in easy reach.

Kuroko’s appetite hadn’t grown at all, a mystery that continued to confuse Akashi. The man played an extremely active sport four times a week. How did he have enough energy to play? Akashi’s normally appropriate-looking serving looked huge compared to Kuroko’s small amount. As if the tealette knew what he was thinking, he chuckled.

“If you think the difference between us is bad, the difference between Kagami-kun’s portion and mine is terrifying.” At Akashi’s questioning look, he elaborated, “You know at Maji Burger I usually have a milkshake and maybe a small burger?” Akashi nodded. “Kagami-kun has at least twenty-eight burgers.” Akashi promptly choked on his mouthful of rice. Kuroko eyed his choking and coughing form amusedly. “That’s usually his reaction to finding that I’m suddenly sitting there too.”

 

 

After dinner, Akashi insisted on helping Kuroko with the washing up, which the tealette reluctantly agreed to. It was only half-seven, so Kuroko made some tea for them both, which they took in the living room.

“Kuroko. Your crush…” A kind smile spread Kuroko’s lips.

“I told you before, Akashi-kun. I’m fine, you don’t need to answer.” Akashi bit his lip and hesitated. Did that mean Kuroko didn’t _want_ a relationship with him, or didn’t feel that way anymore, but merely felt the need to tell him just to get it off his chest? He felt his other self sigh and push to the front. He let him, knowing that he’d probably deal with it better than he would.

“Tetsuya.” He said, sitting down next to the tealette. Tetsuya looked up at him, tilting his head.

“Yes, Akashi-kun?” He reached for his hand, which Tetsuya gave, frowning a little in confusion. “Is this still about –” Akashi smiled, widely.

“I love you, Tetsuya.” And Akashi felt rather proud that he actually got Tetsuya to gape, his eyes wide in surprise.

“You what?” The polite speech was gone, which amused Akashi.

“I said I love you.” He softened his voice, one hand reaching up to cup Tetsuya’s cheek. The tealette unconsciously leaned into the touch.

“Is this coming from you, or both of you?” Tetsuya frowned. “Because it would be awkward if only one of you loved me, even if I have a crush on you both.” Akashi chuckled liltingly, leaning forward and putting their foreheads together.

“Isn’t it also awkward if two personalities in the same body love you?” The tealette appeared to give this actual, serious thought, making Akashi laugh. “Oh, you’re precious, Tetsuya.” He shook his head. “No, this is form us both, my other self is merely being ridiculously nervous about it.” Tetsuya blinked.

“Why?” Akashi kissed his forehead in a friendly gesture, as neither personality had any idea of how Tetsuya would receive the affection.

“Because it’s a little nerve-wracking, telling someone you love them, even if you know the other one likes you too.” Tilting his head, Tetsuya’s brows furrowed in confusion.

“Oh. Should I have felt nervous when I told you I had a crush on you, Akashi-kun? Looking back, I think I was excited that I finally knew what a crush was and how I felt about you. Is nervousness what I should have felt? Should I not have told you?” Akashi laughed, while both of him low-key cooed over how cute and clueless Tetsuya was.

“No. You feel how you want about telling me. If you felt it was okay, then it was. If you didn’t feel nervous, then you didn’t.” He smiled gently at the tealette. “There is no rules about how you are supposed to feel about telling people you like or love them, merely what the media and society tell us is the norm, which doesn’t exist because no two people feel the same way about a situation.” Tetsuya nodded, smiling.

“Okay, thank you for telling me. Then, seeing as Akashi-kun feels the same way anyway, he can tell me when he wants.” Akashi drew him into a hug, and let his original self take control again.

“Thank you, Kuroko.” Akashi felt Kuroko smile into his shirt.

“It’s okay, Akashi-kun.”

“Seeing as we’re going to be together, do you think that’s close enough for you to start calling me by my name?” Kuroko chuckled.

“I do call you by your name, _Akashi-kun_. What else do you think I’ve been calling you all this time?” Akashi snorted uncharacteristically.

“Don’t be smart. Call me Seijuurou.” He entreated. Kuroko was quiet for a moment before pulling away and looking up at him. His eyes were serious.

“Are you sure?” Akashi nearly rolled his eyes, but playfully narrowed them instead.

“Are you defying me?” Huffing a laugh, Kuroko shook his head.

“No, I would never, Seijuurou-kun.” Akashi grinned at getting the stubborn tealette to agree without much fuss, and decided he’d push his luck.

“Would you drop the suffix?” Kuroko’s amused look told him he knew what he was doing and wasn’t taking it seriously.

“No.” Akashi was startled into laughter when he felt an extremely uncharacteristic whine travelling up his throat, but let Kuroko think that it was his blunt, monosyllabic response to the request.

 

 

While their relationship changed, the way they interacted did not, with the exception of Akashi visiting Kuroko more often. It was one such visit that they finally had a conversation about what Kuroko was and wasn’t comfortable with. They were lounging on Kuroko’s bed, where Kuroko was up against the headrest reading and Akashi used the tealette’s stomach as a pillow while fingers ran through his hair.

“Kuroko? Can we talk?” Kuroko peeked under the book to look at him. When he saw how serious Akashi was, he put his bookmark in the book, closed it, and put it on the bedside table, offering Akashi his full attention. Akashi smiled at the trust in Kuroko’s eyes. “Would it be okay to talk about what you’re comfortable with?” Seeing the confused light in the tealette’s eyes he sat up, crossing his legs and pulled Kuroko into his lap so his back was to the redhead’s chest.

“Comfortable with?” Akashi sighed, wrapping his arms around the smaller man, pleased when Kuroko snuggled into him (it had surprised him at first, how cuddly Kuroko was, but then he supposed it made sense with how little he touches others unless basketball is involved).

“You know I’m demi-sexual, right?” He felt the other nod. “I don’t mind not having sex if you don’t want to, but I would like to know what you are comfortable with. Do you like kissing? On the mouth? How much can I touch you? Where?” Kuroko was silent for a moment, thinking through what he’d said.

“I wouldn’t mind trying kissing on the mouth.” He said slowly, and Akashi nodded. “As for touching,” The redhead could hear the other’s smile through his voice. “I like it when you hold me. It feels nice.” Akashi laughed softly, kissing his temple.

“I’ll keep that in mind.” He said warmly.

“I don’t know about other touches, but I trust that you’ll stop when I ask you to.” Closing his eyes, the redhead squeezed Kuroko gently before relaxing again, a smile on his lips as he enjoyed the faith and trust in Kuroko for him. “And sex… I don’t find it repulsive, and I do find you attractive.” Kuroko elbowed him playfully in the ribs when he chuckled. “Shut up. So I would like to try sex with you, but if it doesn’t work out, I could always help you out anyway.” Kuroko’s voice lowered. “I rather like the idea of you losing yourself to the pleasure that I could give you.” He said huskily, and Akashi shivered, a blush forming on his face, liking the mental image himself. “I can see it. You’re so beautiful, with your red hair, and ruby-red eyes, and your ruby-red and gold eyes. You’d look amazing, spread out before me, a red flush on your cheeks as your eyes glaze over from the pleasure. I’d start off slow, just touching you everywhere, everywhere but where you really want me to. Do you think you’d plead with me? Beg me to touch you right where the heat curls?” Kuroko asked rhetorically, his tone almost dark and his fingers lightly trailing over the hand on his stomach. Akashi shuddered and buried his burning face in Kuroko’s neck, panting already, even though Kuroko hadn’t even touched him, his hands bringing the tealette closer to him. Where the hell did Kuroko learn to talk like this? Who knew that the tealette had such a side to him? “Tell me, Seijuurou-kun. Would you let me enter you with my fingers, stroke your walls? I’d be so good to you, Seijuurou-kun. I’d help you feel so good.” Akashi planted a wet kiss on Kuroko’s neck.

“Kuroko.” He swallowed, throat dry. He knew his eyes were wide with surprise and arousal. “Kuroko, where on earth –” He was interrupted.

“I bet you’d be _filthy_ , slick and wet with lube, your desire so _thick_ I would _taste_ it in the air.” Kuroko hissed, devilish amusement in his voice. Akashi jumped when Kuroko scooted back a little, and the redhead moved away, not wanting his surprising lover to discover the state of his erection. The tealette removed himself from his lap, turning and pushing Akashi down flat on the bedsheets. He sat himself next to Akashi, staring down at him, and Akashi gulped at the intense heat of his gaze. “Would you like that, Seijuurou-kun? Would you enjoy that? How would you like me to bring you to the peak?” Kuroko put his hand on his chest, and to Akashi it felt like a hot brand, searing him to the bone. He gaped at the tealette, wanting to speak but not wanting to interrupt Kuroko, wanting to find out what else he had in store for him. “I could find your prostate, stroke it until your sobbing, begging me to stop. Or,” Kuroko tilted his head thoughtfully, voice lilting. “I could avoid it altogether, just press around it – oh, I could do it for hours, you’d be so slick and pliant around my fingers. You wouldn’t touch yourself, would you, you’d be good for me?”

Akashi nodded dazedly. “I – yes. Kuroko…” He cut himself off from what he was going to ask. Forget asking where this sudden surreally erotic dialog came from, he just wanted to know how far the tealette would take this. His other self was near purring, enjoying the way Kuroko was taking control – the twist from his usual manner intriguing him. Kuroko’s face was as blank as usual, the only difference being his husky, low voice, and his dilated pupils. The stark contrast between what Akashi _knew_ he was feeling on the inside and his outward expression made him think that Kuroko really was suited to this kind of thing.

“Yes, Seijuurou-kun? Is something wrong?” The tone of Kuroko’s voice made it clear that he knew nothing was wrong. His hand trailed up from his chest to the side of his face, and he leant closer. “Am I not pleasing you? Am I not being good to you?” Akashi’s eyelids fluttered and he huffed a weak laugh.

“Kuroko, you are being very good to me.” He shifted a little uncomfortably, feeling the tightness in his trousers. “It’s just a little –” Kuroko gave a small smile, wickedness touching his expression. His hand left Akashi’s cheek and travelled down his arm to his hand, interlocking their fingers.

“Is it too much for you?” He squeezed his hand. Akashi smiled helplessly, goodness, he loved this man.

“Precious, I can take anything you hand out.” Kuroko raised an eyebrow at the challenge, even as his eyes softened a little from the endearment.

“Is that so? Then,” Kuroko kissed his cheek chastely and whispered, “touch yourself.” He undid the redheads’ trousers, but otherwise did nothing to help. Akashi blinked in surprise. Kuroko half-smiled and tilted his head. “No?” The redhead didn’t reply, and merely kept his gaze on Kuroko as the hand that wasn’t being held smoothed its way down his body and slid under his boxers. He sighed, relaxing slightly as his hand encircled his erection. The tealette squeezed his hand again, bringing it up to his mouth to kiss gently as he smiled down at Akashi, lowering his voice. “Good boy. Do you prefer to be stroked to orgasm, feeling the warm tug of a hand, or would you find me massaging your prostate to be far more effective? I wonder how wild you would get if I did both – or would you not need my hand around you if I’m inside you, rubbing against your walls?” Akashi groaned softly, his hand moving smoothly over himself.

“Why don’t you find out?” He replied cheekily, licking his lower lip. Kuroko looked rather amused, detangling their fingers.

“Not this time, I think. This time, I want to watch you fall apart.” Akashi’s eyes nearly rolled back in his head as the words caused his hand to unconsciously tighten on his length, creating a particularly rough stroke. He sighed a small moan. Kuroko gave a little smile, one that Akashi immediately dubbed as ‘evil’ due to its deviousness and false innocence and the subsequent effect it had on his body. “Gently, Seijuurou-kun, there’s no need to rush.” Akashi’s other hand wrapped around Kuroko’s wrist, trying to tug him closer as he obeyed the tealette. Kuroko went with it, shuffling closer, one hand taking the liberty of travelling up Akashi’s shirt, tickling his stomach slightly.

“Kuroko.” He breathed, the hand moving to the tealette’s cheek and hair. “Kuroko, please…” Kuroko leant closer.

“What is it you want, Seijuurou-kun? Do you want me to kiss you? Touch you?” His eyelids lowered halfway, mischievousness glowing in his eyes. “I can’t help you if I don’t know what you want.” Akashi was torn between laughing and groaning in frustration.

“Kiss me.” His voice took on a commanding overtone. The tealette bent his head, kissing his cheek. He growled in annoyance, his muscles tensing. “Not there.”

“Then where?” The other replied lightly, smiling at him innocently. He didn’t believe it for a second. “You didn’t specify.” He rolled his eyes, and didn’t notice Kuroko moving his hand from his stomach until it was moving heavily up his thigh, stopping an inch before he came in contact with Akashi’s still-moving hand and massaging firmly. He squirmed a little.

“My mouth.” He refused to plead again. Kuroko’s innocent smile gained an edge that Akashi couldn’t describe.

“Of course.” He said, already lowering his head. Kuroko began chastely, and Akashi savoured the simplicity, the heat. He twisted his fingers in the tealette’s hair, forcing him to tilt his head to deepen the kiss. Kuroko sighed against his mouth, rubbing his thumb in the crease between his thigh and groin. Pleased, he licked the tealette’s lower lip and smiled inwardly when Kuroko opened his mouth to him in response. He’d licked his way into the tealette’s mouth when Kuroko pulled away, frowning a little. “Sorry, but can we not do that?” He looked away from Akashi’s eyes, focussing on his collarbone. Akashi laughed, breath hitching when Kuroko rubbed his thumb a little harder in retaliation.

“Okay. Too fast,” Oh, and how strange the notion was when they were doing _this_ , “or you just don’t like it?” Kuroko stayed silent, a thoughtful look in his eyes as he decided to fill the silence by planting slow kisses on Akashi’s cheeks and neck.

After a few minutes, during which time the stimulation Akashi was giving himself was becoming a little much, making him shift in place and his breathing to get heavy, Kuroko replied, “Maybe a little of both? It felt a little weird, and messy, but I could maybe come to like it?” He didn’t sound sure, and Akashi’s eyes softened reassuringly, even as they half-closed from the pleasure.

“It’s fine, we can do – _oh_ – what you like.” Kuroko scraped his teeth experimentally on Akashi’s collarbone as he spoke, and he guessed that the redhead had liked it, if the way that his head had tilted to the side, exposing more of his neck, was any indication. He looked in Akashi’s eyes, pleased at the glaze in them, at the love and affection he could see gathered in the swirling crimson depths. Removing his hand from Akashi’s thigh, he framed the redhead’s face with both hands and pressed their foreheads together.

“Seijuurou-kun, I love you.” He smiled affectionately, his gaze locked with Akashi’s. “So, let me see you come apart?” He said throatily. Akashi shuddered, panting harshly and flushing. Kuroko watched the dilation of his pupils, which quickly contracted as the redhead reached his peak. He kissed him, smothering the high-pitched, almost whimpering groan that escaped Akashi’s throat. The redhead panted against Kuroko’s lips as he calmed down slowly. Kuroko smiled, a slight triumphant glint in his eyes as he trailed kisses along Akashi’s throat. “You looked amazing, Seijuurou-kun, absolutely stunning.” Akashi laughed breathlessly.

“Thank you for the compliment, Kuroko.” He smirked at the tealette. “Now will you tell me where all of this came from? Where did you learn to talk like that?” Kuroko blinked blankly.

“I just wanted to try it. Everything I said was true.” Akashi thought he saw Kuroko smirk mischievously for a moment, before his lips were once again in their usual neutral line. “And I read a lot of books.” He said vaguely and stood before Akashi could properly process the statement, looking down at Akashi. He smiled impishly. “Would you like a wet flannel, or would you like me to run you a bath?”

Akashi blinked. “…. A bath?” Kuroko appeared to take that as his choice, and walked into the adjacent bathroom to run it. Akashi blinked again. _‘He reads a lot of books…?’_ Akashi’s other self chuckled, the sound uncommonly dirty.

 _Tetsuya… who knew you were into that sort of thing…?_ Then he addressed Akashi. _Oi, next time it’s my turn._ Akashi smiled bemusedly, which turned more affectionate when Kuroko called him into the bathroom for his apparent bath.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed this ;)  
> I will, at some point be doing a little add on for this, either about Akashi and Kuroko telling the GoM (and Kagami) about their relationship, or it being set in the future and Kuroko's parent's fulfilling their threat/promise and Akashi being all protective (maybe with awesome/supportive Akashipapa), or both?


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